Thursday, 5 February 2009

Two Castles from England

A couple of months ago, I shipped two suitcases from Melbourne to Shanghai via a freight company that I might name later (I will wait till I have my goods in my hands before doing so).

Yesterday, I received a call from the China staff of said company and the following conversation ensued:

FREIGHT HO: Halo! dis ssssrkjlrkjs slkejljer slkjskjrjs rrssshkkkttt (very fast speech in incomprehensibly accented 'English')
ME: I beg your pardon? Who are you again?
FREIGHT HO: ssdkljrslk srlkjss sssss (again, very fast speech).
ME: I'm sorry, could you speak a little slower? I'm having trouble understanding your accent.
FREIGHT HO: sssdkjhsdlf sssddlkjdsg sddffss (again, very fast speech).
ME: I'm sorry, did you say [Freight Company]? (I took a guess)
FREIGHT HO: Yes.
ME: Ah. Ok. Yes?
(The rest of the conversation on her side remained pretty much unintelligible, with much tooing-and froing between us as above, but I will skip most of the BS for expedience).
FREIGHT HO: We delivery two castles to you tomorrow.
ME: Castles?
FREIGHT HO: Yes.
ME: You mean, you are delivering two suitcases, yes?
FREIGHT HO: Yes. Two castles from England.
ME: No. Not England. We shippped two suitcases from Melbourne, Australia to Shanghai. Not England. Please confirm that you have the correct shipment.
FREIGHT HO: aaaaaaaaaah... I don know where shipped from.
ME: Ok. (I'm used to Chinese service and don't even bother reacting to this one)
ME: Please tell me my reference number (trying to force her to check that she had the correct shipment).
FREIGHT HO: aaaaaaaahhhh.... We delivery two castles tomorrow.
ME: What is my reference number?
FREIGHT HO: We delivery two castles tomorrow.
ME: Stop. Listen. What is my reference number?
FREIGHT HO: We delivery two castles tomorrow.
ME: Ok. My reference number is [Number]. Please check that you have the correct shipment.
FREIGHT HO: We delivery two castles tomorrow.
ME: Ok. Whatever.

Come 11:00am today (if they show up), I might be coming into a couple of castles from England *whooo hoooo!*

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